This year we were all by ourselves on Christmas Eve. We did a party buffet, decorated cookies for Santa, acted out the nativity, ate ice cream sundaes with my homemade hot fudge and butterscotch sauce, read stories, opened gifts from Grandma and Pa Ras, and excitedly went to bed awaiting Santa to arrive and deliver our presents. We had a really lovely time.
The Boys
The Girls
Santa cookies for Santa. :)
Very last minute we decided to take some pictures for a Christmas card for those that aren't ridiculously up to date on our lives via our blog. We were finally recovered from pink eye enough to not look like someone had punched us in the face, the hubby was finally with us to take part in such a picture, and though we had terrible colds we figured they wouldn't come across to apparently in the pictures. So we plowed a pathway into our backyard and set up the tripod. Our efforts for a spectacular picture were in vain but we did get at least one suitable family picture. And the kids, I don't think we'll ever get a picture with each of them looking at the camera and smiling. We'll just pretend we are going for the candid look! ;O)
Before I set out on my monster trek to see the "doc to be" over the thanksgiving holiday I talked to my sister about her delivery plans. She said she didn't need any help. BUT, it just didn't sit right with me. Sure she is wonder women and all but I know she would have a lot more fun if I were around! ;) So I twisted her arm until she finally asked me to come. Happily a visit to Phoenix was added to our itinerary. After we regained some strength from our Disneyland fun and my car got out of the shop the kids and I headed to AZ. It was so fun to be with my sister again. Sisters are the best thing in the world! This being her fifth baby I was given the responsibility of watching all seven kids (including my own) and the two cats and a horse - oops, I mean dog - while she did the real work of having a baby. The best part was that at the last moment we asked her super cute neighbor to watch the kids while I dashed over to the hospital for the birth. My sister made birth look like the easiest thing ever and baby Seth was absolutely perfect. You know how most newborns are at their ugliest right after birth because they are all puffy and covered in yuck and their heads are all shaped funny? Well, not this kid. He was perfect.
The seven rascals, as they really all are, had lots of fun partying. When I heard that the hospital was giving Bethany and her hubby a romantic dinner the night after Seth was born I knew the kids and I had to have some fun of our own. We had a kid party. :O) The next day we made a little birthday party for baby Seth for his homecoming. The kids made the cutest banner you have ever seen and we had a birthday cake, balloons,...I sort of cant turn down an opportunity to throw a party. It was really fun.
Then the worst case of pink eye struck and thus it was time to hit the road for Vegas. After one sleep we head to Reno. And found ourselves missing the absolutely perfect weather of Los Angeles, Las Vegas, and Phoenix. I do not like being cold. But more then that I miss being able to hang out with Bethany in person instead of talking on the phone for two hours daily. Miss you!
I am home. It feels nice. Today was stressful. I drove by myself with three kids two having terrible pink eye, one having diarrhea, I having a fun case of PMS, through pockets of fog for seven and a half hours, being so sleep deprived, and having no movies or anything for the kids. I arrived home to find massive amounts of snow, that our house has no water, and discovered broken pipes. So what do I do? I over pay a plumber, realize we do have water under our house, shovel a mountain of snow so I can park my car, realize I am getting pink eye too, listen to a million messages I will reply to tomorrow, stare blankly at the pile of business stuff I have to catch up on and the unpacking to do, and realize we haven't even thought about Christmas yet,.....BUT I still feel all calm and happy inside. :) Why? Because my Stewart is coming home in four days and he is actually staying home for an entire semester! After that we'll have an even higher degree of madness to deal with but in the mean time we can just be. Oh, what simple exquisite joy. That is all I want for Christmas. To gather around our tree all together with no noise from the outside world and teach our children all about Christ. Lovely. Then to be able to say goodbye to an extremely busy, fun, challenging, and eventful year while stepping into a new year well rested just tops it off as a dream come true.
Just four days and I am there. :)
We had our family trip to Disneyland and it was soooo much fun! It really is a magical place espeacially at Christmas time and with little ones. Being there with our Kids and watching them have the time of their lives was about the best thing in the world for Stewart and I. Half way through our day Stewart told me that he thought that it was one of the happiest days of his life. :) It really was so great. The big kids were the perfect age...seriosly thought everything was so magical. They really love Mickey and Minnie and adore the princesses so meeting them was a dream come true for them. We happened to be there on one the bussiest days of the year: the candel light processional, Walt Disney's birthday, Saturday, Christmas season...But it didn't make things crazy for us. We were there when they opened the gates and we played until 9pm. i realized that Disneyland is a great place for babies too! You can take them on so many rides and they have a great baby center and everything. I am so glad we went. If I could I would recommend everyone with little kids to go. When it started to snow I got all chocked up and even cried a little. The advertising is true. It really is magical and one of the happiest places. Here is a picture slide show and a list of some of our favorite things were able to do:
- Haunted Mansion - Gadget's Go Coaster (twice) - Autopia (twice) - Mad Tea Party (twice) - Tarzan's Tree House - Disney Princess Fantasy Faire - Mickey's House - Meet Mickey - Minnie's House - Meet Minnie - Nemo Submarine - Jungle Cruise - Pirates of the Caribbean - Alice in Wonderland - Casey Jr. Circus Train - Dumbo flying Elephant - "Its a small world" - King Arthur Carousel - Peter Pan's Flight - Storybook Land Canal Boats - Watch light show at Small World - Watch Tatiana's Jubilee - Watch part of the candle light processional - Watch the main street parade - Space Rockets
We were in Las Vegas for Benjamin's birthday and so we were happy to be able to have a party with Stewart's family. I stole my sister's teddy bear cake pan and made a cute 3D cake for Benja Boo and the kids thought it was wonderful. I did a rich chocolate cake with peanut butter frosting it was like eating a really fancy peanut butter cup. Yum. I will post the recipe on my food blog soon because I think it is a new family favorite. We had homemade Mac and Cheese and hot dogs - his favorites. He was spoiled with some great gifts including a little blanket I made for him that I was pleased he loved. We had a wonderful party. I am still in shock at how fast his first year has gone. I think with each child it just goes faster and faster. Here are a million pictures! Enjoy feeling like you lived it too. ;)
One year ago I gave birth to this beautiful baby boy. I remember all through my pregnancy I felt so close to him like we were all ready really great friends. It has remained that way. I feel like he and I are good old friends. I love being with him and he has been nothing but joy. I couldn't have asked for a more pleasant baby. I am so grateful to have him and his older siblings. They, with their father make my life absolutely wonderful. Everyday is tiring but ultimately filled with smiles. I am so glad Benjamin is ours. He has made this past year extra special. We all adore him!
The kids and I loaded up on Wednesday morning and headed toward Provo. It was a long drive but the kids did well. We took our time and didn't rush it too much. We made lots of stops and stretched our legs often so we weren't too miserable when we finally arrived at Grandma Larsen's house. We stayed up until daddy got there late at night and we were so thrilled to be together again.
We had a wonderful time with our family members in Utah. It was so nice to be with those people we love so much and make some new fun memories: racing obstacle courses, football playing, EATING, nose hairs! LOL, watching BYU's victory, doing my hair (thanks Becca), playing games, and talking and teasing each other. We had fun being with aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins, nephews, nieces, and siblings. I hope next year will bring just as happy of memories!
Here are some picture memories from our Thanksgiving. Someday I will get some pictures at my brothers house! I promise we love you just as much!!! ;)
I just wanted to share my feelings I had this thanksgiving. I slept in, never happens, NEVER! Said hello to all the beautiful family I was lucky enough to be with and then went for a six mile run. I went on the run I used to do everyday along the Provo river trail. It was a really pretty sunny day and it felt so good to be back and have the flood of memories wash over me. It was nice to think through where time has brought us since those days when I would run that same trail everyday. As I ran I thought how my cup was truly running over with blessings. I am so grateful for all the things I have in my life. I sometimes think I am the luckiest girl in the world. :O) The entire weekend I was incredibly happy to have our daddy with us again. It is the best thanksgiving wish I could ask for. I hope you all had a wonderful thanksgiving too!
Last night we did a Family Home Evening on being Thankful. We read D&C 59:7 " Thou shalt thank the Lord thy God in all things." When Bridger gave our closing prayer he prayed that he was thankful that Angeli was "sick" and that "her eyes were a little bit red." After his prayer I started to correct him and told him we don't thank Heavenly Father for things like being sick. But then that scripture sort of replayed in my mind. Stewart (via the cell phone) said he thought we should just let it go and let our son give "thanks [to] the Lord thy God in things". Later that night I began to think of how very grateful I was for some great blessings in my life that aren't really the most sot after things.
Familial Distance: Not living close to any family has been really good for us. We have become our own. We are more self sufficient and can throw together a wonderful Christmas dinner or Easter feast invite our ward family over and have a great time. We can turn to our friends for help. Before we always went to family but now we have to call on our friends and that has really made our relationships outside of our family so much stronger. Our ward really is like family to us. We look out for them and they look out for us.
Spousal Separation: People often say that absence makes the heart grow fonder. Its true. I feel like our love for each other has tripled this year. Never before have I adored, cherished, and appreciated Stewart more. I feel every moment I have with him is a gift.
No Men Muscles: I have had to become more self sufficient and strong while Stewart is away. There is no waiting for Stew to come home to take out the mountain of trash, no "Daddy will fix it when he gets homes". Its just little old me. I have to say I feel really good about myself that I can be the daddy and the mommy when I have to be. Its not easy but I know when it is required of me I can step up to the plate and hit a home run.
Nomads: We have had more time with our family members this year then we have had in a long time. It was really good to have so much time to be with our loved ones. It was hard to be away and be scattered but it was nice to feel what it was like to live at home again. To help moms with dinner every night, to greet my dad when he came home late from work and to watch our kids get to know and love their grandparents, aunts, uncles,and cousins better. I cant imagine us having that opportunity in many other ways.
Poverty: We have always been frugal but since med school we had to learn to live on entirely new levels of frugality. It has been really good for us. We have come to appreciate the simple ways to have fun even more, to budget down to the penny, and how to find peace of mind with placing our money troubles on the Lord. He has always provided for us. Always.
Needing Miracles: Over the past years we have really needed miracles. Never before have I seen so many small and large miracles. I know we are as well off as we are today because of the miracles that happen on a daily basis. Unexpected checks that come just in time, packages filled with clothes for the kids, cars given to us, friends calling right on cue to offer to watch the kids, Christmas mysteriously delivered to our doorstep, praying for clients and then getting phone calls the next day, ward members helping us build a fence donating dozens of hours and tools making the impossible a reality,... Every step of the way miracles have been getting us through. The faith we have grown from that is tremendous. These miracles are edifying and extremely humbling.
Endless School: Our entire married life has been governed by our school schedule. It has been nice to have a husband in school. He is always learning and able to work toward something he cares deeply about. Its a little lame to be working at a huge loss, but it is so rewarding to know we are going somewhere and not at a stand still.
There are so many things that are not the sort of things people day dream about but when they enter our lives they eventually leave us stronger, better, and happier. I am thankful for all these things because they add up to today and I really do believe that today is the greatest.
Stewart we know you sort of have a day off today and that those are the days you miss us the most. So we thought you might like seeing the Little Rascals playing together. :O) Study hard! Just five days until we get to see you!
I just wanted to say when you live far from all extended family and your husband leaves to go to school across the state for six weeks it is hard. That life with too many things to do is terrible without a husband , and that preparing for all the holidays/and a three week long vacation with no husband, and too much to do is absolutely painful.
The other night after I survived my twilight party catering I lay in bed coming down from my panic attack and felt so exhausted. Like that kind of exhausted you only have after you have had a baby or something. Like every drop of you physically and emotionally is spent. I was relived it was over, excited to see what my future would hold (its got to be better right?), a little too tried to really think of all the work ahead of me, and really just so empty of all energy. I was aching so badly for a big hug - as if I really needed someone to help give me some strength but I knew I would just have to find it somewhere in myself because there is no other way. I don't know what I would do without my faith in my Savior and Heavenly Father. I would not be okay at all. I am so grateful that when I need to be more then I am they lift some of the burdens so I can keep going.
I have been in awe of single mothers. Plus, I think I understand why some of the many people who aren't like me are not like me. Trying to do everything all at once can be a real personal disaster if it really is more then you can handle. I am going to learn how to say "no" which is hard because I HATE letting people down. I just want people to be happy. BUT I need to stay sane and coherent because my children rely on me for everything.
I have all these plans (drive to Utah, drive to Vegas, drive to LA, go to Disney land, drive to phoenix, come home throw our primary activity the next day, be alive for church on Sunday with teacher training), and then survive the weeks till my husband comes home again. - um, it feels not fun at all right now - well, that is not true. The things in and of themselves sound wonderful but when I think about what it means for me to be there and to have my family there all alive and everything it feels not worth it anymore. I am wondering why I have signed up for these things. I fantasize about changing it all and canceling it all. But for what? So I can be here alone? That is terrible too in its own way. Its sort of like I have to pick my pain: do more then I should make myself do or be alone, feel left out, and carry the weight of my responsibilities while I battle loneliness. I will go on my vacation and it will be better then I think but I guess I will just need a lot of hugs when I get there. All I want is to be home and have some peace and have my Stewart there. I just want to be able to take a deep breath and have no fear of any more panic attacks. This is newer for me. I usually am up for a party, heck I am usually the one throwing them, but these days I just want to be all together with my family again, my own little family. ah. :)
So I am sorry to vent but I really needed to voice my feelings. It helps to think someone out there knows what I am feeling.
*this is not meant to be "I have it the worst!" or written because I want people to pity me or anything like that. Its just my expressing the hardships I am facing and how I am dealing with them. I know there are people with bigger trials on their plates, I get that. I am not feeling sorry for myself. I am just knowing and expressing that things are harder then they are easy when I don't have people to really talk to about this sort of stuff as much as I need (you know the hubby gone and all). It's no more, no less.
