Such good kind hands.

We have lost our share of library books over the last year. Each time we have had to replace them at cost, time, and energy to us. I promised myself after each book had been lost that it would be my last lost library book. With every loss I would take even more extreme precautions to insure our borrowed books safe return. But as my life would have it we lost yet another book. Like all the ones before I was flabbergasted that I could have lost it. This time the lost book was Bridger's favorite. We ALL searched high and low. After renewing the book for the last possible time I was disappointed that I would have to face the grumpy librarians to tell them I was still a bad parent who had lost ANOTHER book. Just going to the library when my kids are hushed by all those around and people are constantly giving me looks like "control your children!" is hard enough but to have to face them and explain I am as irresponsible as they assume is painful. Besides, searching online for a lame old book that would cost more then it was worth because it is out of print is not my favorite pass-time either. Thinking of this approaching fate I thought we would just have to stop going to the library all together. With all this on my mind I began praying fervently for this book. Several times a day I would say a little prayer that I would be blessed to find it so we would not have to go through that ordeal.

Tonight I found the book. It was were it should have been all along. I had looked there at least five times, Stewart had searched there at least twice. It was on our way high up (children cant reach) "library book cubby". Just sitting there like it had always been there with all the other books.

I pulled it out and Stewart and I were totally astonished. It was an honest-to-goodness miracle. I don't know any other explanation then that Heavenly Father placed it there somehow.How? I have real answer only that it must have been a tender mercy.

It brings so much awe and comfort to my heart to think that Heavenly Father would bring about such a miracle for us. I mean really, a library book?!?!? I feel as though He his reminding me that if He takes such care to accomplish a thing like finding a library book how much more care He takes to protect, guide, and lead our family's welfare. It is so very good to know we are in such good, kind hands. Thank you Heavenly Father for our library book miracle. :O)

"The doctor said no more wawow."

Last week Angeli, Bridger, and Benjamin had a dentist appointment. It was with a new dentist. One I like much better then our old one. Our old dentist assured me that Angeli's teeth were not being affected by her pacifier. So I haven't really made it a priority to have her get rid of her pacifier habit. But this new dentist, who is a lot more on top of it, told me that her teeth were very much affected by her pacifier, to the point of affecting her speech. When Stewart got home I told him the news. He has been pushing for her to get rid of it but I wanted to let her keep it until we survived him being gone, our Thanksgiving and winter trips, and until she gets more used to her toddler bed. BUT with this in the equation we both knew we had to bite the bullet and talk to her about giving it up. Stewart sat down with her and explained what the dentist said about her pacifier making her teeth grow in wrong and making her mouth not work correctly. She sat there for a moment taking it in. Then she looked at me very seriously with so much sadness in her eyes and said, "Mommy, the doctor said no more wawow?" (wawow at our house is the same as binkie in other homes) Then she said it again very sadly; she was about to cry. I said "Yes, honey. The dentist said it is hurting your teeth." Then she just kept repeating that same phrase over and over again, "doctor said no more wawow". Each time she said it she became less and less sad to the point that she was becoming very serious about it. Finally she exclaimed waving her finger in the air, "THE DOCTOR SAID NO MORE WAWOW!" and that was that. She has not touched one since.

Yesterday she had a hard day. She has been waking up every night and not been able to take naps without it. She was crying and so exhausted. I tried to give it to her so she could take a nap but she said, "the doctor said no more wawow Mommy!" Later she came up to me crying once again so tired out and said, " I want my wawow." I told her that it hurt her teeth and she said, "Yeah, the doctor said no more wawow." and closed her wawow drawer all by herself.

It is so impressive to me to see just how determined she is. It is hard for her to give it up but she is choosing the greater good no matter how hard it is for her right now. How very mature of her. I think we have a very determined, smart, strong girl on our hands. What a blessing she is in our home.

Stepping Out into the World!

or at least down the hall. ;o) He really walks. Its official. Its adorable. Its a Benjamin triumph for sure. Grandparents, this video is for you. Such a cute tODdlEr!

Trunk-or-Treating Oz Style

The Rasmussen Rendition of The Wizard of Oz

Dorthy

Scarecrow

Cowardly Lion

We had so much fun at our multi-ward trunk-or-treat. They had a cute little carnival for the kids after they went trunk to trunk. The enjoyed: face painting, the bounce house, staring in the costume parade, playing games, braving the glow in the dark room, eating lots of cotton candy, ... When we got home Bridger exclaimed, "That was a very Happy Halloween day!"

Pumpkin Party!

So I love doing little parties with our family. We threw one very importune party last night and we had a great time. I hope we can make it a tradition!

We carved our jack-o-lantern family

We roasted pumpkin seeds

We made and even enjoyed homemade pumpkin juice

And of course watched Harry Potter to go along
with our pumpkin juice.

We are so loving this Pumpkin season!

Someone to Love

Life can never get too hard when you have someone to love. Stewart is just that for me. I think he is just about as wonderful as they come. He makes everyday I live full of love, sunshine, comfort, and friendship. Lately I have been needy and I know that is not very fun for him but despite that he holds my hand, wipes away my tears, weathers my frustrations, and kisses away my heart ache. And when it is all said and done he still thinks I am wonderful. He has given me thousands of my favorite memories and a promised future I know will be full of thousands more. He is my favorite. Stewy, I am so very grateful you are my someone to love.

I do.

For years I have looked back at my wedding day and wished I had spent more time picking out a dress. I was sort of a lost bride. I had no idea what was involved in being a bride or how one went about getting a dress or anything. I knew no one in my same place of life. I had no one to ask to go with me dress shopping. I wanted a close friend, someone who would really tell me if the dress was terrible. I wanted my sister to come but her coming meant her three kids coming including her brand new baby. So I decided to go solo. I picked a Saturday morning and set off driving around town by myself trying on dresses. Little did I know that was odd. I was in jeans and a sweat shirt. I had my hair pulled up in a sloppy pony tail and I am not even sure if I did my make up. I gave myself one day to go...it was the middle of a semester after all and school kept me pretty busy. I went to these fancy places and they wouldn't even let me in because I hadn't made an appointment. There were these little barbie brides with their mothers and five best girlfriends and sisters woowing and watching them as they spun in the 360' mirrors. I felt really embarrassed to be there in my state. One place did let me use a closet to try on dresses. Oh, that was awful.

But I found one place that didn't make me feel like the most depressing neglected bride on the face of the earth. It was Peggy's Bridal. Its the place on State Street in Orem with the bride in a box out in front...a little scary and awkward. The dresses there are not that pricey, they are totally mass produced, and the ladies who run it look like ladies you'd see running your Relief Society (baking casseroles and quilting blankets for all the new babies). I was once again the only solo bride but it was easier to fade away when the place was filled with tons of really old awful brides maid dresses and eight dressing rooms.

The entire day I tried on dresses only to find that I looked absolutely dreadful in wedding dresses. I was not built for them at all. Everything was going wrong. I had dreamed of this moment for years as a little girl and it had arrived but it was pathetic.

I tried on two dresses at Peggy's Bridal one was not my style but was actually pretty on me. The other was more my style but seemed a little too cheaply done. I felt encourage that I had found one dress that was ok looking and I thought I could handle going to a nicer place to try on more dresses. I left and it was dreadful once again. I was about to admit defeat when I thought I should head back to Peggy's and look at those two that weren't that terrible on me once more.

I pulled out the two dresses and tried them on. I was stuck. I needed a friend to help me decide. But no such luck. There was a group of girls outside my changing room waiting for their bride to come out so I ventured out to ask their opinion. They were completely rude. I think they thought I was stealing their bride's mirrors or something. I asked if they would be willing to help me decided but they gave me crusty looks and ignored me completely. So I stood there for one final look as a group of really rude women glared at me from behind and I tried to figure out if this dress was it. I liked the dress I was wearing. It looked the best on me by far. It just wasn't what I thought I wanted at all. It was sweet and simple. Finally I summoned the lady who worked there to help me unzip the dress. As she did she smiled at me and said, "We call this our temple dress." Oh, and of course it was. But I wanted to be breathtaking, glamorous, modern or romantic. I did not want a Utah Mormon standard temple dress! But as I sat there in a cloud of white I realized I felt like a bride going to the temple in it. I felt pretty, clean, and pure. I felt ready to kneel at the alter and covenant for eternity to be by Stewart's side. So in that moment I picked my path. That was it. The "temple dress" was mine. I was that little sweet Mormon girly, not a sophisticated glamorous beauty.

It made sense but I was always a little disappointed. I thought I gave in too soon. I should have looked harder. I never felt like showing it off or showing off my wedding pictures. I thought I looked to simple, so very plain. I would always admire other brides and wonder why I hadn't been able to have a dress more like theirs.

Today Angeli was looking at pictures from our wedding and she was saying how beautiful I looked, that I was a princess. I asked the kids if they wanted to see my wedding dress. They were thrilled that I still had it.

I got it out to their gasps of adoration and awe. I was pleased they were so taken with my $400 dress. On a whim I asked if they wanted to see me in it. They of course were even more delighted. I put it on (it still fit yay!) and it was magic. That same feeling came over me. I felt beautiful. I did feel like a princess. I felt like a girl who could kneel at the alter in front of her creator. I realized why they called it the temple dress it just felt like one. And this time was better, I had an audience to tell me I was beautiful.

Bridger asked me to dance and so we did. Angeli wanted to try it on and that was about the cutest thing you have ever seen. In those moments I fell in love with my dress. As I stood there looking at my reflection with my children staring up at me I realized I had chosen well. It was the prefect dress for me. I wouldn't have wanted any other dress.

That dress had come to symbolize all the things I had to set aside when I picked my life with Stewart. I would not do study abroad. I would not travel the world. I would not get some advanced degree. I would not be that sophisticated girl I thought I wanted to be. I would be just another sweet little Mormon girl. Now five and half years later I looked at where that choice had brought me. I looked into the eyes of my son as he danced with me in my wedding dress, watched my daughter sparkle as she stood drowning in a mass of white feeling the most beautiful she ever had before and it was so very clear. I made the right choice. I do love my dress. I do love being that little Mormon girl.

I lost it somewhere along the way

I have lost my long term memory somewhere along the way. It is just about gone. I have almost no childhood memories. Almost no teenage memories either. They vanished soon after I got married. Now I don't mean to sound overly dramatic but could my mind have blocked them out? I have often wondered if I embraced my new life with Stewart so wholeheartedly that I accidentally blotted out my life pre-stew? My life was so crazy right when I left home for college and so many changes happened so fast. In a matter of 8 months I graduated from high school, had family crisis at home, moved out on my own for the first time, started college, met Stew, got engaged, got married, and all of this was done at the age of 18/19. I didn't really slow down after that. Three years later I had two children, graduated from BYU, was working on starting a business, buying a home, and moving away. Life was busy. I was going as fast as I possibly could to keep up and I wonder if I just stopped thinking about my past because I was so thoroughly focused on the future. I have been trying to remember things about my childhood. Trying to think about things more and more and ask my siblings questions to help me fill in the blanks. It has been coming back a little here and there. It wireds me out. I used to be the girl that could remember everything. I guess it is a good thing that I am keeping a blog and a journal so that I can at least read about my past if I cant remember it on my own.

Play Group at the Pumpkin Patch

We went to the pumpkin patch with play group this week. We had a really fun time. The kids watched the farm animals gorging on pumpkins, played on the tractor, jumped in the bounce house, raced around crazy with their friends, and basically had a ball. The kids are in such a fun place right now. Love them. Loved it.

I love how the kids are picking their noses in this one! LOL

New Leaf

My life has gotten really complicated lately and it has been making me slightly miserable. But I am turning over a new leaf. I am getting back to the basics. I am thinking that the rest of this year is going to be magical, fun, and meaningful after all. I am embracing the things that make me fulfilled and happy and shedding the things that pull me away from that satisfaction. I am going to try and enjoy every moment of my absurdly blessed life. I'm not going to let things get me down no matter how awful they seem in the moment. No winter blues this year! Not a chance. I am embracing what God gives me and running with it.

Oh, I am loving autumn's arrival here in Reno. It feels so good just to breath the crisp air. Absolutely Lovely.

"You are 28 years of aged Stew perfection."

Yup, my man is just that. He has aged 28 years into Stew perfection! Happy Birthday Love! This weekend was HIS weekend. We went to Sacramento and spent the night with our favorite people there, Uncle Shaun and Aunt Sue of course! We hit up Sierra's soccer game, cheered Shaylin at her 24 hour dance-a-thon, visited Aunt Sue's awesome kindergarten class (the kids thought they had died and gone to heaven), and then headed to Apple Hill. After our afternoon at Apple Hill we headed home via South Lake Tahoe (loved the pretty drive), and then finished it off with a movie night. On Sunday we had Stewart's birthday dinner complete with homemade snicker's pie and orange chicken. The kids and I decorated with streamers, made party hats, and cards. The kids were in awe of their creations. :O) We love our Stewart and thank Heavenly Father everyday that he is ours. Here are some picture memories...

We took a little nature walk at half time during Sierra's soccer game...its so pretty there. Every where you look there is a perfect little trail to explore. Stew's top pick for residency right now is UC Davis. We'd love living there. Time will tell...right now we've just got to survive third year!

Us at Able Apple Acres:
Bounce house, kiddie roller coaster toy, ridding horses, and exploring the craft shops.

At Denver Dan's we ate lunch, picked apples, and visited the petting zoo.

Sunday's Birthday Dinner!

Yes and even my orange chicken! Yum.

We're Talking Double Digits Here!

Yup, the littlest Rasmussen Rascal is in the double digits now. 10 months old! I cant believe he is so close to a year. My life is going too quick for me, I am seriously having more and more freak out moments these days with all of us getting so old so fast. Benjie, we have cherished watching you grow and learn every step of the way and we look forward to a life time of more and more of them. Thanks for being one of us Benjie.

What this kids is doing as of 10 months:
- standing on his own
- taking steps on his own
- growing in two more teeth (7 in total)
- loving getting patted on the back...when I hold him and he is tired he rests his head on my shoulder and then pats me on my back urging me to pat him on the back. And then he hums. I love how he is learning to communicate his wants.
-Loves drinking from a straw
- dancing
- waving
- signing
- playing catch
- clapping
- hugging
- kissing
- breaking his mother's back (carrying him a round has given me a permanent back ache)
- copying sounds we make
- eating everything in sight
- loves driving (dragging) cars around the house
- giggling and smiling

Here are pictures we had taken of him for his 9 month pics. They were taken two days before he turned 10 months so I figure they count as his ten month pics too. ;)

Thanks for the Love

I just wanted to say thank you for all you who sent me cards, phone calls, gifts, notes, and little messages for my birthday. You have no idea how much they meant to me. I had a really nice birthday. Stewart cooked dinner, cleaned the house, rented me a movie, bought me my favorite movie, gave me my favorite shirt of his - yay!, and helped the kids make cards for me. What a fabulous husband! In just three days I get to reciprocate. Thank You Everyone!

Twenty Five

So it is my birthday. I am twenty five years old today. Well, at 5:10 pm to be exact. I feel old. I know that 25 is a young age but really its not that young anymore. I am now closer to thirty and I am sorry all you thirty or forty or fifty or sixty or seventy somethings but in my book 30 is the mark of not being "super young" anymore. My whole life when I tell people my age they gasp and tell me I am so young for having so many kids or whatever...but I know that response is fading as I get older and older. Soon I will tell people my age and they wont bat an eye. That is fine. Maybe I should be offended that they assume I am older then I am but really "wow, you are so young", whether meant as an insulting judgment or flattering compliment I don't care, it has become part of being me. I will miss it a little bit. Anyways, moving on...

We are celebrating this weekend with a joint thing for Stew and I. Therefore today is going to be low key but I am still looking forward to soaking up every moment of it. I have no where to be and nothing pressing to do! Oh, that feels so good. I am going to go the pace I want all day long and drink in the freedom of having a "me" day. For my treat I am making a prune cake. I thought it'd be fitting as it could mark the celebration of my becoming a dried up old prune! ;o) I found it on The Pioneer Women's site and she said it was a must try so we are doing just that. I love trying new/odd recipes. If Pioneer Woman loves it then I am sure I will too!

Happy Birthday to me!

"It's Bootaful!"

This summer we have been looking forward to Angeli moving into a big girl bed since she was very ready for one but with our crazy lives it hadn't been able to happen. However, when the Daddy returned we excitedly ordered a cute little toddler bed. It arrived this week and we got busy setting it up for her. When I mentioned to Stewart that I wished we could paint her room too he said that could be a fun birthday gift for me if I wanted. I jumped at the offer. Six hours later we had completed her room. Here is her big girl PRINCESS TEMPLE bed. Yes, that is all from her. She keeps saying that it is "Bootaful", that its like a "pincess, temple, oom!" We are so glad she likes it. I feel that every little girl should have a magical room since my room was very magical for me growing up. This little room seems to do the trick for Angeli. Daddy, thank you so much. You are such a good sport with all my home improvements that you end up doing most of. Angeli, we love you!


PS It does look more impressive in person. ;) But you get the jist.