Do you ever have episodes in your life when everything seems to give way all at once? Do you ever feel like the Lord is asking you to go so far into the unknown you find yourself truly scared? That is my life right now. Life has been this way off and on since we moved. And within the last three days it seems that we are hitting another marathon of trials that has almost left me speechless. If it was just one of the hurtles by its self bearing down on us then that would be a major stress but with them all combined I am totally .... I guess, beyond stress...more like breathless. It just seems so odd that things can be so hunky dory and then in a blink of an eye be so utterly wrong. No one has it easy. We all have our episodes of trials and then of smooth sailing. I guess I am just getting wary of our waves of trials crashing against us. And when I wonder when it will all be better I have no clue and find myself even afraid to hope it will be better. I know we will be fine. The Lord has always taken care of us. I know someday we will look back at this time with tender hearts as we recollect on all we learned, at how our faith was strengthened, and how we grew to know our God. But for now, in this moment I can only pray that all my fears can swiftly be smothered in peace. I keep thinking of the scripture I heard in the broadcast of President Hinckley's funeral today;
So I am writing simply because I needed to and perhaps one of you out there will benefit from reading it too. I am so grateful that I have so many of you rooting and caring for me and my little family. I don't know how we'd make it without you. Love you guys!
"Be still and know that I am God."
Those are perhaps the most beautiful words ever spoken to a troubled heart; and I guess that is were we are at. I am so grateful that tomorrow is fast Sunday. I will have a great opportunity to be still and feel the closeness of my Heavenly Father. My brother once told me that when he feels like he has the weight of the world bearing down on him he thinks of Job. He said, "Job was a lot more righteous then me and he had it a lot worse then me and he was OK in the end. So I can't complain but rather have faith." Yes, it could always be worse, and it will always be OK.So I am writing simply because I needed to and perhaps one of you out there will benefit from reading it too. I am so grateful that I have so many of you rooting and caring for me and my little family. I don't know how we'd make it without you. Love you guys!
3 comments:
Emily- I am not sure what you guys are going through right now...that is awful..I should know, but know that we are thinking about you. I wish I had good advice with this. I do know that the "Lord is a sun and a shield" and that you will be helped during the difficult times. You will be able to look back at this and think, "We became stronger" because of this. It doesn't help when things are hard and getting harder. I remember feeling that with a new baby and when Brynlee broke her leg, etc. I wish I could fly out there and help you but we'll be fasting with you today and calling you later. Have a good Sunday...we love you lots and YOU ARE DOING A GOOD JOB.
Sad to hear things aren't going well....please let me know what we can do to help. We're on the mend from our little flu episode around here, and would be more than willing to do anything we can to help.
And yes, I can identify with those periods of time where it feels like the trials come on top of one another and don't even get a chance to breathe between rounds. I know it's a part of Heavenly Father's test for us, but that doesn't always make it any easier to deal with. Hang in there, we love ya.
Yeah, life can sure get scary. I echo Gordon B. Hinckley, "Oh...It will work out alright." And with the Lord helping us it always does, doesn't it!
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