Dear Benjamin,

Dear Benjamin,

For weeks I have been writing in my head the post I should have written you for your passing of 18 months and today I am actually making it happen! ( Even though you are now 20 months old) One of your many nicknames is "my joy baby". I know that is a really odd nickname but it is probably the one that makes the most sense. You have brought our little family nothing but joy since the moment you joined in on our crazy lives. I cant believe how fast the months have gone. You are a little boy now and we are all loving every moment of your growing up. You are in such a fun stage! The kids are always pointing out to me your new achievements and love that you are old enough to play with them.

You are getting better and better at expressing yourself and love repeating words. I can say the silliest words I know and you do your very best to say them back to me and it is very cute. The way you say "Bridger" is one of my favorites, you say it so sweetly. You are putting your own little phrases together and I laugh every time you come up to me and grab my hand and in your most serious expressions say "come now mama.". I love the way you do your best to keep up with your big brother and sister . You are so patient with them and adore your sister who treats you more like her son then anything else.

Your smile shows all over your face, your eyes sparkle and your dimples are just the cutest finishing touches. I can tell you love seeing others smiling back at you and delight in giggly moments with your family members. You are a good boy and try very hard to do things how they should be done. When you are told to go to timeout you always go and sit in your little corner all by yourself and come out ready to say sorry and give hugs and kisses. After you have done the whole drill you are always so proud of yourself and come to mom for a big hug and kiss as a reward. At nursery you like to stay right by Sis. Scott's side until you have warmed up to the new setting without mom. She gives you lots of hugs and cuddles and you always come back to me smelling of her sweet perfume. She is like a third grandmother to you and you love her very much. Strangers usually make you feel shy and when you are shy you want nothing more then to have your mama hold you. You come up to me and quietly say, "Hold you. Hold you. pease." It makes me smile every time. Angeli likes to take you by the hand and help you warm up to new places. She is very sweet to you.

You love to cuddle, read stories, jump, throw rocks, wrestle, talk, take baths, color, to tell the temperature of things, give big giant hugs, make up silly games, eat almost anything but especially suckers, talking on the phone, to start the dish washer at all hours of the day, load the laundry machine, water the garden, play with blocks, push cars around, and demonstrate to the whole family that you staunchly believe that mother loves you the most.

You have no idea that there is a baby coming and I think you will freak out when you are not the littlest baby anymore. Good thing we have over five months to get you ready.

You have a special place in our family and we love you very much. Thanks for being part of the gang. We wouldn't be as happy without you!

Love,
Your Mama